21 June 2010

What Fresh Heck IS This, Vogue

So I saw this and thought, Oh, OK, Vogue has moved on their retro pattern line to ugly designer maternity wear from the 90s.
I was wrong.
Why, Vogue, why?!
Then I saw that they were making a line for stylish witches.
Too bad the hat isn't included in the pattern. I mean, I might have bought it for that.
The coat is actually kind of neat if you took all the fugly beading off the skirt. But whoever styled the rest of the ensemble must have been a Project Runway reject.
Lastly, there are Origami Ninja Woman pants. I think Peter should've made these instead of the Harem pants. They're kind of neat in an ethnic way. But they still don't make up for the other atrocities.
Then, the same woman designs this amazing dress. Go figure.
As a bonus pattern surprise I present the Easter Egg costume. Perhaps they're test running a line of costume patterns, what with this and the rich witch.
So this is actually my third edit to this post, but I just found so many more ugly patterns I couldn't help myself.
All I can think of are ugly communist military uniforms. Note the pant-hem interest. Yuck!
I guess hairdressers thought their scrubs needed a little fancifying.
 When you wear pants as a jacket!


  1. OMG so funny you really made me laugh at this great comments. I cant believe it.

  2. Wow...those are...wow...I'm at a loss for words...wow...

  3. What kind of drugs were they on? Yikes!

  4. Y'know, I'm going to go out on a (questionable taste) limb, and say for the record that I actually LIKE the pink Star Trek muu-muu/caftan. In fact, I have every intention of wearing such a garment in my old age, with large, chunky jewelry, artsy reading-glasses, and close-cropped "Joan Baez" hair. For now, though, it's just jeans and t-shirts...

  5. Wow. Just wow. I feel a little bit dirty after seeing these.

  6. yikes! let me jsut qoute bart simpson for the 1st time since 1992- "aye caramba!"

  7. Your comments on these are hilarious (and spot-on)!!!

  8. Wow. Those are amazingly bad. WHY? WHY?!?!?! I don't understand who approves this crap to actually be released! I want to know who makes these. I really do. So I can ask WHY?!?!?!

  9. SO awful. How do those pockets stand out on the first one? But I have to admit I have the pattern for the black and white flowered skirt -- which I think would be really cute without the vomitous spray of color spilling down the front. What is with that?!

  10. The first one has go to be the worst. It wouldn't even be cute for children's clothing. And what's with her hair?

    (btw - I finally blogged about the Rubys!)

  11. Haha, oh wow. Lost for words :)

    I would LOVE a copy of your bird cage veil pattern. I haddn't quite worked out how I was going to make it. I'd probably just wing it knowing me and then hope for the best.

    Thank you so much for offering :) My email is:


  12. My eyes, my eyes---they burn! Oh my gosh, did they pick the fugliest fabric on purpose?! I feel like my eyes need to be scrubbed, but you made me laugh with your comments, so it was totally worth it.

  13. Haha, you have me in stitches! Spot on observations, especially 90s maternity hehe. The only kind thing I have to say is that I like the bow detail on the back of the pants with wings (ninja), thats transferable. The worst has to be the easter egg, seriously, who is going to buy that? The ethnic skirt with pockets is a design I've seen around recently, its not *too* bad in reality...


Folks Serv